What Type of Gamer is God?

Have you heard the entire universe is actually just a simulation? At least, smart physicists and people like Elon Musk seem to think so. And Elon Musk is rich, so he must know a thing or two about the universe.

If the entire universe is indeed a simulation, like a video game, then God must be the player. The User. This means God is a gamer. The question is, what type of gamer is He? Or She?


Or It…

There are basically two types of video gamer. Those who play on consoles, like the Xbox and the Playstation, and those who play on their personal computers (PC) I suppose there are also those who play exclusively on tablets and cell phones, but God would never be a mobile gamer. God hates mobile gamers. It says so in the bible.

At first, it makes sense that God would be running his game on his cosmic PC. Personal computers are the most flexible gaming platform. When you play games on a computer, you have access to all the game’s files. You can modify and manipulate them. You can even add new things to the game, and completely destroy others. PC gamers can fix games that are broken. And they can break games that are working just fine.

Gaming on a PC is rarely just about playing games. You have to make sure all the settings on the computer are perfectly suited for whatever game you are playing. Drivers constantly need updating. Hardware needs replacement. For all the freedom a PC offers the gamer, most PC gamers spend more time tinkering with their machines than actually playing games. And even after they get everything set up just so, the computer will still crash for no discernable reason.

If the universe is God’s game, and God is a PC gamer, then the universe would end up crashing all the time.


Error. Application Earth.exe failed to start. Error code LC-202.

I have never seen the universe crash, because God is actually a console gamer. The universe as we know it is much more similar to an xbox or playstation than it is to a PC. Consoles don’t offer the same freedom as a PC. On the other hand, consoles work just about all the time.

The main strength game consoles have over PCs is reliability. You can’t tinker with a console the same way you can with a PC. There is really no good reason to. Any idiot, and plenty of geniuses, can ruin their computer without even knowing it. Consoles are idiot proof. And mostly genius proof, too.

I know if I was working on the most complicated software/hardware combination ever, something like an entire universe, then once I got it going I wouldn’t want to keep messing around with it. And I certainly wouldn’t want others messing with it.


Consider Bob Vila vs. Tim Taylor.

I know when there is a game I really want to play I will usually go for the console version. PC’s are great, and I have played a lot of games on the computer, but if you just want a game to work then a console is your best bet. I think God is the same way. When he wants to play The Universe, he just wants to play. He is finished tinkering. He doesn’t want to spend eons trying to get the graphics drivers to cooperate with the operating system.

If the Universe is a simulation, like a video game, then God is both the programmer and the user. He is the game designer as well as the player.

In primordial times, God probably designed the universe on his computer. He got all the parameters defined and he created all the files…

And once he got everything just the way he wanted it, he ported the game to his reliable game console. If your computer game crashes, it is a frustrating experience. If the Universe crashes, well, that’s the end of everything.

And that is why God is a console gamer.

Destroyed Earth

“Eh, PC graphics are still better.